As iron sharpens iron,

so a friend sharpens a friend.

(Proverbs 27:17)

I grew up in a dysfunctional family—without religious values, encouragement, or educational guidance. I had every reason to be a great failure. But mentoring became the pathway for me to overcome my circumstances and avoid that dreadful path.

Others supplied what my formative years lacked. My positive experiences of being mentored led directly to the positive results I have had in ministry. Mentors who intentionally invested their time and shared their lives and insights have had a great impact on my life, which is why this subject is so dear to me.

Friend to Friend

I was a professor at theological colleges for more than 35 years. The early interactions I had with many young pastors convinced me that theological training must be more than cognitive transfer.

Dr Howard Hendricks, Pastor Chuck Swindoll’s mentor, frequently quoted Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” Maturity in the Christian life occurs through relationships, person -to -person, friend -to -friend. It includes the whole individual, character and all. Real growth comes from more than books.

Ministry leadership can become lonely. Pastors become disillusioned and many fall ill, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Christian mentoring can provide a safe learning environment through relationships.

As a professor, I quickly realized mentoring is not merely a supplement to academic training. It is the core of training.

One of the most important aspects of its developmental power is accountability, which helps to ease emotional struggles and to mend character flaws, fostering a healthy pursuit of fulfilment and purpose.

Have Fun!

When I first met Alex, a talented and energetic pastor, he was young yet active in his denomination. His dedication to the Lord was commendable, but he lacked joy.

I realized the risk this posed to his health, family life, and ministry, and that it could lead to significant personal burnout. Mentoring provided an opportunity for him to relearn the value of enjoying life. We took time to study the Word, discuss topics in ministry, pray for each other...and we made time for fun! We rode motorcycles together (much to my wife’s protest). He started dressing like a young person again, became more careful with his health, set aside time for leisure, and prioritized his family. Alex has grown into a mature pastor, a well-known speaker in his denomination, and a theology teacher passionate about missionary work.

Jesus’ Way

Jesus’ mentoring of His disciples unfolded in the rhythm of daily life, during travels, social gatherings, home visits, and spiritual practices. Jesus encouraged, rebuked, and comforted His disciples, showing that the relationship itself was one of the purposes of His teaching.

Mentoring is how I exercise my Christian service, helping other leaders just as I was helped. I seek, through my example, to teach what I have learned—that a master is the one who serves, the one who kneels at the disciple’s feet to wash them (John 13:4–5), attending to their essential needs.

Mentoring has brought me joy, not only because of what my mentors have done for me, but because of what I have received from my mentees. It’s a rich experience that I highly recommend. Mentoring isn’t about showing a ready-made recipe to a blessed life. Instead, it’s simply about showing the way of Jesus—who is “The Way”—and then journeying together.